scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
