Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
