How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
