She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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