why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
