so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize