oh god the rape fog is back!
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize