Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
