good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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