Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
