I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
