Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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