So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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