Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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