Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize