Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I am available for nakedness
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
