It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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