What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
