That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
handjob tips. give me some.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
