she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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