We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
