What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
