life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize