Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
He felt like a one man threesome
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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