You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
