He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
