For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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