Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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