Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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