Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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