Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
