Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
