I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
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