That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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