Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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