Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
