it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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