Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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