all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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