Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
