i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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