I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
ttyl tear gas
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize