idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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