people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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