Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
