If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
