you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Randomize
