I bet he comes in French.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
