I'm lost and stupid without you.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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