can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize